Well-being Wednesday: let’s talk about sexual well-being.
🌈As a PT, sexual wellness is in my scope of practice but it’s not something taught (and only briefly mentioned) in our graduate programs (and this is true for many healthcare providers). And yet, in the past, my clients would want to discuss it – how their physical impairments or disability would impact their sexuality. Honestly, I wanted to discuss it too. It’s a complicated and fascinating topic with intersecting considerations – physical health and disability, emotional health and stress, cultural upbringing and taboo around the topic, gender inequalities, how you feel about and in your body, power exchange, racial differences, etc , but I wanted more training. After waiting for about 2 years, I finally began my (AASECT compatible) Sexuality Counselor and Educator training last month through the Sexual Health Alliance – the training has been a perfect fit for me and I feel like it’s a homecoming in a way.
🌈 What started my interest and the journey? A lifetime of happenings, but Emily Nagoski’s book Come As You Are (and the related workbook and book Burnout). The impactful take away, for myself, my clients, and my current training? You are normal. (This is kind of a part 2 of my post about normalcy, see yesterday). Normal is a spectrum, not one homogenized and limiting version sold to us by our misogynistic culture. Also important: “pleasure is the measure” (not performance), and “don’t yuck my yum” (we are all normal but different and our desires will reflect that).
🌈 The book Sexual Intelligence by Marty Klein (highly recommend) examines “normal” sex and it’s not worth aspiring too: awkward, lacking in communication, obsessing over performance or looks, not laughing, don’t feel as close to their partner/s as they’d like, etc. 😬 I hope this “normal” doesn’t apply you and I hope you back slowly away from past versions of normal and start crafting and embracing your own “normal”. For help with exploring your sexuality, check out Aasect for certified sex educators, counselors, and therapists.
🌈 I think the rebellious part of my personality is drawn to sexuality because of our society’s desire to shush it/shame it/stuff it away. That disgust and discomfort instead draws me in, thanks too to my insatiable curiosity (This must be part of my draw to the topic of death education, death cafes, and psychopomp; check out the events page for our next death cafe.)
🌈 How have ideas around “normal” sex and sexuality limited you?
🌈Wishing you all the pleasure and well-being you desire (and hoping you check out the books I recommended). More here: https://bookshop.org/shop/ignitewellbeing
Happy hump day! #wellbeingwednesday #sexualwellness #thenewnormal #fthepatriarchy #emilynagoski #pleasureistgemeasure #sexualitycounselor #octoberispridemonth #lifestylefriendly #sexpositive #happyhumpday
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Written by Dr. Allison Mitch, copyright protected, please cite accordingly. Originally posted to social media on 10/14/20. Image is from Pexels. Interested in working with me?, email me at ignitewellbeing.naperville@gmail.com
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